Aunty matchmakers - 'Make me a perfect catch'
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The first couple she matched has come back to her seeking help for their daughter, a 24-year-old nurse.
According to Li, a hospital-related job is bad news for matchmaking, especially for women, because it is too busy. Women are supposed to have plenty of time to devote to their husband and family.
For both men and women, civil service and other secure jobs in the public sector are preferred.
"The single most important condition for a woman is to be pretty," says Li. "It is even better if she works in the public sector, which means a lot of free time. If she has an okay income, that means she has more choices for men with incomes higher than hers."
Her current list contains around 200 women and 20 men. When she thinks she has a prospective match, she informs both parties and asks the man to call the woman and set up a meeting. These often take place in fast-food restaurants where they don't have to linger and can split the bill. She attends if they request it.
One 27-year-old Europe-born Chinese went to auntie Li. She was told to lower her expectations, especially given her age. She was advised to tell any man that she earns less money a month and definitely not say that she holds a master's degree. She was also told to add a couple of centimeters to her height.
Auntie Li also told her that she couldn't arrange a meeting right away because it was so-called "Ghost Week" following the Qingming Festival.
"It is so much more difficult in matchmaking today compared with 30 years ago. People were much easier to work with then," complains Li.
"At that time, as long as the man was good-hearted and honest, it was a good match. Now, all these young women keep saying that they have no 'feelings' for the men. But they have to consider their own situations - they get older and their circle of options gets smaller every single day."
Lower your standard - that's Li's big piece of advice for women.
She adds that some picky young women in their late 20s just keep seeing different men and don't try a second time with someone they don't immediately fancy.
Li is confused about why all these young women wouldn't lower their standards, despite the cruel reality of 200 women to 20 men on her lilst.
Some of the women are as young as 20 years old and still in university, "but their parents are worried that all the good men would be gone when they graduate and step out into society. They want to get prepared early."
She calls those over 25 the "difficult" group and those over 30 the "impossible" group."
Other matchmakers sympathize.
Hard case
Mary Lin, a 31-year-old corporate executive, is in the "impossible" group, and is on the long list of another very frustrated matchmaker.
Lin has seen 48 men for blind dates in the past 14 months and is still not satisfied. She has set up three more for April and plans to see more later.
"I'm actually just doing it as a habit now since everyone around me is so worried about my marriage. But since I'm already in the impossible group, why should I compromise now?" asks Lin.
She says going on blind dates is like going on job interviews these days - nothing happens, you just keep going and get numb to it.
Lin is a big problem for Katherine Wang, a 72-year-old Chinese American, who came back to stay in Shanghai six years ago after an 18-year stay in Los Angeles. Wang devotes herself to matching "young elites," as she calls them, mainly overseas Chinese, "returning turtles," and children from rich families.
She says that independent women are difficult to match. She advises Lin to talk less, not take charge of the conversation, be more feminine and less assertive.
Usually, Wang asks the man to call the woman and set up a blind date. These are usually a cafe in a five-star hotel; the guy picks up the tab.
Sometimes, she also attends if they request it, to make introductions and break the ice.
One of her success stories is matching the son of a former Swiss Chinese diplomat with a daughter of a real estate developer. Wang calls it her "greatest achievement, a perfect combination of money and knowledge."
She says that once young people agree to meet, "it's usually pleasant and they're talkative. They know why they are there - for marriage, rather than love."
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